Happy Birthday in Heaven...

2 years ago we said hello and goodbye to our sweet baby girl Eleanna.  Today we celebrate her second birthday in heaven.  It's hard not to look at the boys and think...would she have really red hair like Parker, or would she have cute curls like Jesse.  What cute outfits would she wear...what would she love to eat.  What funny things would she do?.I suppose some people think that it must be easier...now that the boys are here.  In some ways it is in others not so much.  Sometimes I just feel down right cheated...cheated out of her life...cheated out of her hugs...denied her giggles, but then I remember.  Those things were not meant to be.  She was meant for heaven no matter how much I dislike that...no matter how it makes me feel.  For certain God definitely had & has great plans for me.  That not to say it's easy...

My thought also go to our friends Mike and Teresa as they celebrate their precious girl Ayla's 2nd birthday today too.  They have Gracin to celebrate with them now and I am so happy.

Later this month we will get together with Mike and Teresa to celebrate our girls.  I can't wait...with the arrival of all our boys we have not been able to get together as much...

My Dearest Eleanna-

Each day I think of you.  I wonder what amazing things you do in heaven.  I know there are so many ther with you I bet you hardly miss us.  Your brothers are so strong and beautiful.  I know you must have had a hand in that.  I'm sure you look down on them and giggle.  They sure are some funny little guys.

Your roses in our garden are so bright and cheery.  I love to see them bloom.  

Enjoy your birthday in heaven sweet girl.  I wonder if Great Grandma Meiners will make you a cake?  Or maybe Great Grandpa Meiners will make you a kitchen cupboard to play with like he did for me.  Maybe Great Grandma Marsh and Curran will be there too...  Maybe Grandpa Marsh will take you to a park and push you in a swing...

I'm sure it will be wonderful, but I still want you here with me.

All my love, hogs & kisses,

Mommy

 

Sometimes I really wish there was an EASY button...

Seriously, this week has been crazy...

To start things off my Grandma who just a year ago was helping me with the boys and full of pep has taken a bad turn in the last few months.  It seems she had an un-diagnosed stroke, bleeding ulcer and swallowing issues.  She it almost 93.  She is in the nursing home re-couping from loss of blood due to ulcer and could use your prayers...  Hopefully she will make a good turn here with the extra care, but if it's not meant to be I just hope that she goes peacefully...


Then my husband hurt his foot at work this week and still has not found out if it is broken or what what's wrong because he is waiting to get approval for an MRI from work comp...ugh...so frustrating...

To top that all off Parker needs tubes due to his numerous ear infections and fluid build up.



Then this week for whatever reason I have been thinking a lot about Eleanna...my co-worker and I were talking about her daughters hair getting tangled at night and I was saying that my Mom used to put my hair in french braids at night during the summer.  Then all the sudden my hear sinks and I think...I'll never get to braid my little girls hair...  I'm not sure maybe it's because of Grandma's decline that I'm thinking about her more...Or maybe it's just a summer thing...Summer makes me think of her since that's when she was born.


On a brighter note our family bought a camper at a site on a lake and we have been relaxing there on the weekends.



It's been nice to just get away from the mess at the house and relax and push the boys in the stroller, take them swimming and such.

One Year Old...

http://homemadehappenings.blogspot.com/2012/05/introducing-jesse-parker.html

I can not believe it's been a year.

A year ago...

 I had only held the boys a hand full of times.

 I was getting rides from friends to the hospital because I couldn't dive myself yet.

 I still had not wrapped my head around how much m life was changing.

I spent every 2 hours pumping around the clock.

I did not know how long it would be before we brought the boys home.

I did not fully realize how hard being the Mom of twins is. I was in baby love.

I did not realize how much sleep we really got before.

I did not realize the bond you can make with perfect strangers in less than 60 days time.

However I did realize...

How incredibly blessed we were.

How much our extended family and friends love all of us.

How hard it is to have healthy children when others are not.


Today...

The Boys...

Bring me so much joy.

Are the cutest ever.  Of course I may be biased. :)

photos taken by Liz Foley Photography

are into EVERYTHING!

Crawling, Scooting and pulling themselves everywhere.

are two very different little people.

crack me up all the time.

are worth all the struggles.

make miss their sister even more.


This past weekend we had their Birthday party.  There were over 60 people there from all over.  Some even made a 5 hour drive to be there.  I hope that one day they can fully appreciate how many truly love them.  I am so blessed to be their Mom.

There is so much that I want to put in this post...

10 months old..where does the time go...

Parker and Jesse are 10 months old today...

 Jesse weighs about 18.5 lbs.  He is such a happy guy he still love sleeping in...I wish he would pass a bit of that trait on to Parker...  He scoots around but the big brute would rather just gab what he wants and drag it over to him.  Even his biggest toys...it's amazing how strong he is.  When he crawls he usually pushes backwards and does not like it when he gets stuck in a corner.  He loves eating, but is not so fond of the puffs or cookies.  Jesse has 2 teeth on the bottom and one on top.

As I am typing this Parker is crawling around, rolling his bumbo chair with him.  Parker has really been moving the last 6 weeks or so.  He army crawls and loves to stand up.  He also can sit unassisted which he mastered this week.  He just has 2 teeth on the bottom, one working it's way out on top.  I would guess that he weighs 16lbs now.  We went to our last pediatric cardiologist appointment and his & Jesse's vales are completely closed and will no longer need to see Dr. Shula. He is wearing 9 months clothes for the most part.  He love food.  At this point during the daytime hours he prefers food to bottles.   

We have also started to give them baths in the big tub.  The love"swimming" and kitck their legs like little fish.  They love splashing about.  They also are starting to make more sounds.  Dad seems to be a favorite of Jesse... The both are startign to make each other giggle.  The other day Parker was tickling Jesse and making him laugh.  So cute...

8 months old...

I can hardly believe it...eight months old.

Time has gone by so quickly.  This time last year I had just had my cerclage.  The boys were just little sea monkey's, whom by the way I was so certain were girls...

Now here they are growing up.  I suppose that this feeling will only get worse.  All too soon they will be Sr.'s in High School and eating me out of house and home.

Although they are trying to do that now...they eat anout 6-8 oz of milk per bottle now, and are eating baby foods 2 times per day.  They really like food and it has help a lot with the re-fulx.  Most days I don't have to change their outfits due to spit up that it a HUGE improvement.

Over Christmas they were both sick and had multiple blow out diapers...to tell you the truth our Christmas tree is still up so I can get a good picture of them in the Christmas jammies.  Hopefully this weekend. ***update***

I got the jammie picture :)

Jesse has on tooth and the other seems not far away Parker seems to be working on teeth too.